Escapism and Football Addiction. 8.5 Reasons to Watch the UPL in the New Season

Georgiy Yermakov, goalkeeper of the Ukrainian national team, is leaving "Maccabi" to join "Kharkiv". In Israel, he was among the best by key metrics, especially by the percentage of saves in the last season - a top goalkeeper for the UPL. He will replace the "poor" Varakuta and make the defense of Kharkiv even more convincing. The same defense that conceded 19 goals in 30 matches last season - an elite indicator and the second best in the division after 17 goals of LNZ. Now "Kharkiv" will aim for more. That is, for less. For fewer goals conceded. Now their uneventful matches will become even less eventful. Less spectacular. Ultimately, just more boring. And all because of the goalkeeper transfer. Well, hooray! Maybe...

But not everything is so critical. There may be fewer reasons to watch "Kharkiv" matches, but watching the UPL is still a good decision. Below are just serious reasons to do so in the new season.

Heat outside

On the day of the UPL start, the capital is forecasted to have +28 degrees of heat - too hot for... honestly, everything. At least too hot to be outside. No, it's better to endure the heat at home - with a fan or, even better, an air conditioner. On days when you don't want to do anything at all, the most optimal location to be is on the couch. And if you are here, and the TV/laptop is nearby, then it's like everything fell into place: you need to watch the UPL. Not because it's the best league, but because it's the only one with you now when you are dying from the sun's activity. One day the star will "let you go" (it happens every year), and you will go outside again. But not now. Not this week. For now, just watch the UPL.

Dependence on football

Someone, I'm sure, managed to watch all 104 matches at the World Cup this summer. I didn't. Ignored quite a few. In particular, I never saw New Zealand and several other teams. And even then watched dozens of matches from start to finish. Am I tired of the game? A bit. Have I developed a habit of watching a lot of football? Maybe. Good news: this weekend all football addicts will get a new "dose": the UPL is back. 2 weeks of withdrawal after the World Cup. 2 weeks of failed attempts at social life. 2 weeks of reading news one after another. The return of the UPL is a return to football in particular. The same one that has already given us a wonderful one and a half months of summer. And is ready to give another one.

Meditative pace

Have you seen the matches of France at the World Cup? The attacking group quickly moves the ball. Ollis quickly makes a decision to set up Mbappe for a striking position, so that he quickly escapes from the defender and shoots at goal. Everything is as fast as possible. Here and there - and a moment, there and here - and a goal. Spectacular. Bright. Showy. But too... modern? We live in an era of clip thinking. We watch TikToks and shorts. We scroll through a tape of memes and listen to voice messages at 2x speed. Sometimes you want to take a break from all this. Take a pause. Escape. Pretend it's not 2026 outside, but at least 2016. How to achieve that? Watch UPL matches in August. There is no Mbappe here, no speed. The pace of the game is so slow that you can doze off. Your option for escapism.

Rest after the World Cup

At the World Cup, the fate of entire generations was decided. One moment could change history. Many legends played their last match for their national teams. Every player felt the pressure - not just the footballers. Even the viewers who realized the value of the moment. They sat in front of the TVs holding their breath. Worried about their favorite performers, because if not now - then only in 4 years or maybe never. Watching the World Cup was quite nervous and difficult. Especially tough because of the night matches: to watch, you had to sacrifice sleep and routine. Fortunately, UPL doesn't play at night, and the price of the moment is much lower. Nothing will be decided in the match between "Kudrivka" and "Obolon" in the first round. You can watch without worries and for the soul.

Inventive commentators

A separate paragraph about masters of words. UPL is a league where football is played "without goals" from time to time. A league where a 0:0 score is regular. A league of constant pauses. A league where at some point you even rejoice at yellow cards: they give an understanding that something is happening on the field! Often it's hard to watch - and even harder to commentate. The person with the microphone in the booth has to be inventive during the "quiet" moments on the field: tell 1000 and 1 fact about the unknown goalkeeper, share a story about a forward who hasn't touched the ball for 20 minutes, simulate excitement from a player's shot outside the stadium, and so on. Ultimately, you have to entertain yourself. Think the best stand-up comedians are on YouTube? Listen to the UPL commentators - and see that you were wrong.

Teaches to appreciate the good

A football fan is a skeptic. He tends to doubt. Criticize. That's why all kinds of top failures regularly gather more views than positives. That's why in the comments after matches, winners are mostly not praised - the losing side is destroyed. That's why I manage to hate the UPL even in an article titled "8.5 reasons to watch the UPL". But no other championship will teach you to appreciate the good as much as the Ukrainian Premier League can. When players make 5 inaccurate passes in a row, you will rejoice in the one accurate one after that. After an hour of play without shots, you will be happy to see the first one. After a series of failed decisions by players, you will love the one who looks not only at the ball. Life is about finding the good, especially in the gray weekdays. The sense of watching the UPL is about the same.

A test if you love football

It's easy to love football when teams play with a score of 3:3. But try to love it when it's 0:0. When there are no attacks. No moments. Nothing but yellow cards and struggle. It's easy to love footballers who can do everything on the field - but try to find favorites among ordinary guys. Just like each of us. It's easy to love football without breaks for alarms, but try to sit through 3 hours of breaks for the final 15 minutes of the "Epicenter" match. Football can be very different, and the UPL is one of its extremes. The same one that is often not watched. Ignored. Mentioned with a bad word. But... it's still football. And if you don't love it in its worst moments, do you deserve to see its best displays? Think about it.

Being different

Being a football fan, it's hard to stand out from the majority. Everyone watched the World Cup. Everyone discusses the top transfers and marvels at their sums. Everyone cheers during the summer for the transfers of Ukrainian players to the best teams. It's hard to stand out. You have to do non-obvious things. For example, watch and discuss UPL matches. Then no one will call you a "hype eater". No one will say you're like everyone else. No one will even hint that your tastes are influenced by the majority's tastes.

And in general: while your friends will watch the matches of the EPL for intensity and the Bundesliga for goals, you will watch your own, because... it's yours! And this is actually quite enough.